Clef Rock, Jerusalem – In an unprecedented press conference held today outside the gates of what is believed to be the Temple of Solomon, leaders of Freemasonic Orders from around the world gathered to make an announcement that finally confirms suspicions long held about the Craft. The suspicion? That Ruffians fill the Craft rosters and some are violent, impetuous rogues.
Conference
Chairman Drew Belum explained, “We needed to come clean, confront this issue
head on and keep hitting it until it goes away." He quickly chided, "They simply want what they want when they want it and if we dare even
allude to their actually earning what they demand, watch out!”
When
asked by one of the reporters at the scene whether the rumors were true,
Spokesman Heesa Cowan said quite candidly, “Yup! We have ‘em in our midst. They’ve been with
us since before anyone can remember. The
worse thing is their impact. We occasionally
have to clean up after them, especially when they make demands that can’t be
met.” He looked uncomfortable and added,
“It’s pretty embarrassing too. Every
time they go all uncircumscribed, we end up having to replace another leader. Do you know the cost of replacing leaders
these days?”
Some
don’t think a laid-back Brotherly approach was the best way to deal with the
problem though. Sol Wisemen of the
conference board of directors was quite adamant about it. He had this to say, “We need stricter penalties
for these inconsiderate and impatient unruly rogues. It doesn’t matter that they’re in the Craft
or for how long. It only matters that we
treat them accordingly, like the immature entitled brats they are. I say let them be the architects of their own
demise.”
It’s
not a surprise to some though. Craft Observer Hyta Freemen, an old timer who
claims to have seen it all, shared this, “None of this is new. All ya hafta do is look at the Craft’s
history. It ain’t no secret neither. It’s been known in Craft circles for some
time now that Fellow Crafts have long had a tendency for wantin' rewards and titles before
they earn 'em. In fact, our own statistics
clearly show that three out of fifteen of 'em will go so far as to do violence
against instructors they believe can give 'em what they want. That’s a whopping twenty percent!”
Readers
might ask themselves, "What exactly are Ruffians?" When queried, Brother and Lodge officer Taylor Doormen energetically retorted this,
“Unfortunately, they’re Craft members who want what they have not truly earned
and who demand it to the point of being
violent toward those who they believe can provide it.”
It
was clear from the general mood of those in attendance that there was a need to
Raise awareness of this issue within the Craft.
F&S
Bro. John S. Nagy
-------------------------------
For
more information about Ruffians and Ruffianoscopy, please contact a Local
Freemasonic Lodge or pick up a convenient field guide like, “Building Ruffish”
to learn more.
/G\ :-)
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